Stay Positive right?

Think positive! You Can Do It!

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It’s only Tuesday and already this week is making it hard to stay positive. So far this week I have received two rejection emails for jobs I applied for. I have to get a job soon because I am not doing well with the having no money thing. I spent the day yesterday working on my research paper. I have my 20 magazines picked out so the next step is getting a few copies of each of them. Luckily I have copies of one of them already.

I’m feeling stressed out lately and instead of doing something I’m letting myself get the blahs. I am already letting myself get back to those bad sleeping habits. It’s hard to stay positive every day. It might be easier except I don’t go anywhere or do anything because I don’t have any money and J.R. won’t do anything. Hell J.R. can’t even make friends he either runs them off because he thinks he funny and great and really he’s not; or they just use him for what they can get out of him so the only time he hears from them is when they want something. It annoys me to no end that he won’t get out and do anything. It’s hard for him to because of his job schedule but even when he can he won’t. For example: I wanted to go watch a movie in Nashville. It wasn’t anything special just ‘The Blues Brothers‘ but one of the theaters was showing it on the side of their building and a lot of people I knew where going to be there. It would have been a great experience it wasn’t about the movie at all, but he refused to even talk about it. He said he wasn’t going, he didn’t care and I wasn’t to say anything else about it. He added that we could go do something else but he wasn’t going there, but the things he said we could do were all things where he could avoid all people and completely control the situation. It was all places where I would not be around my friends.

This all adds up to me having a hard time staying positive and needing to do something to start bringing in my own money so I don’t have to rely on him. I don’t want to rely on anyone but myself and I will feel so relieved when I can. For now it’s back to the job search and to finally make a couple of phone calls that I’ve been thinking about.


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