I find myself apologizing


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It’s happening more and more often lately, and what’s bad is that most of the time I didn’t do anything wrong. James and I got into an argument tonight. Not that it wasn’t expected, but it’s still hard. I did not apologize to him. It’s hard around here right now, I am evolving and he is not yet I am not ready financially or emotionally for this to be the end. I would really like to go into everything, but this is not the time. I will say that I do not feel respected, and I react to that by being a bitch. Of course, it does not help that he will not speak to me about things that are bothering me until I make him mad. Then he stays mad for days before he’ll do anything. This time may be different, but I don’t know. He has his little world that he likes to live in and he doesn’t like for anything in it to change. He has this delusion that he is always in the right and everybody else is just trying to make him miserable or being hateful if they say anything to contradict that. He told me tonight that I was the delusional one if I thought that I was in any way right and he was in any way wrong. As I said earlier I have not been a nice person lately, but to be told that I do not know what I’m talking about is hurtful. I wanted to get this blog post done, and the random link changed much earlier, but I spent a great deal of time crying on the phone with my BFF, J.W. I just needed someone to listen and try to make me laugh. I need to be going to bed now, but he’s in there and right now I just do not know what to do. I’m pretty sure I still love him, but I’m not sure if I still like him. I truly believe that if you don’t like someone then you won’t be able to get along, and you won’t be able to stay together. I will try to hang in there for now and see what happens, and eventually I will include more in my blog about things here so that perhaps someone else will benefit.

On another note, my R2D2 Droid 2 should be here tomorrow as long as he doesn’t try to tear it up before I get home. I think I’ll come home early tomorrow.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. lovins insurance agency
    Oct 17, 2010 @ 11:45:46

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